niteo_nix | [Video] VI [Failed!Lock to Cross & Lavi]

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[Video] VI [Failed!Lock to Cross & Lavi]

[She's in the Church, only familiar thing really to her, and it's so very accidental, but she's just... staring listlessly at the alter, fingers fiddling with her device. Looking but not really seeing. It's meant to be private, but she's just not concentrating at all. Usually, she'd rather die then let people see weakness like this, but it's such an old fear and frustration that she hardly even stops to wipe away tears, let alone think. Not that she cried for much more then frustration most times, and certainly not since she lost the war with Mary of Guise.

This was frustration, and a great deal of fear too.

At the very least she's manages enough to make sure Lin can't see this, she refuses to give the woman that satisfaction most of all, and she wished she could slap her again. Nor does she even know how to ask this question, so she's just blunt about it.]

Tell me, when I return, if I ever leave this cursed, wretched place, am I to be executed? Is that why everyone remembers me so much?

[it clicks off]

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No, I may not know. But I would do what I must to help someone dear to me. [He dare not call her a friend anymore.] I am sorry that I cannot do more to console you.

[Just...going to hang up.]

I didn't mean tha--

[But he's gone. This was just getting worse, so she's going to cry in frustration for that too as well, since that seems to be all there is to do.]

You realize you won't remember once you're sent back.

That isn't much comfort at all, if I am to die, I'd rather... make sure I meet as bravely as possible, as my mother did.

[sigh.]

[She tries to smile, honestly. It doesn't work.]

I've been better.

Executed.

Have you done something to warrant it?

[She raises an eyebrow at that, her laughter dry as she wipes at her face.]

You know little of my world, 'warranting' it means someone succeeds in a rebellion against me, and I have many enemies because I refuse to do as they wish. Resent me because I am only a woman, and women are supposed to be weak. It could be the sons of the men I had executed before coming here, it could be a foreign nation and King, it could be my cousin Mary. [she had so few friends, really.]

But if it is what my people want, it does not matter if I warranted it or not, I will submit to it.

[Well - he wasn't to know. He sighs softly, listening all the same.]

Mn.

[It isn't much, he supposes he understands. When there is a need for something, even if it seems cruel - like the annihilation of an entire clan for the benefit of an entire village?]

So it is a possibility? Don't you wonder that back home?

[She nods stiffly.] It's always a possibility. Many, many times have I thought on it. There's precedent, and my brother and sister both had evidence gathered against me, and had they wished it, I could of been executed, that is what being sovereign means. [Ignore the bit where her own siblings had tried to kill her.]

But this is different, I am Queen now, this is more then just dying, I've dealt with that before... assassins come and go, but this? This means I've failed, my family, my country and my people. Execution means someone beat me and took my kingdom from me.

[It seems like a heavy burden. He's not sure how the logistics of her world work - but in the world of ninjas anyone can be executed at any time - or have their lives taken from them, like the Fourth.

But she doesn't live in that kind of world-- that someone would plan and then carry out an execution like they do in her world would be absurd.]

Then I hope for you that it isn't your fate.

[She's stuck somewhere between memories of watching others and horrible nightmares, it's a hard place to remove herself from. Lin really had said the exact thing that she couldn't handle. ]

If I was to die, I'd rather it be an assassin, silently, and without my knowledge. I can't think of a worse way to die, then to be strut out in front of a crowd, and forced to my knees and wait for the blade whilst a crowd cheers. It's loathsome, and I refuse to bow to anyone in such a way.

Can I help in any way? [ She hopes she's not prying too much. ]

For death to be paraded.

[He had no idea, and he's not sure how he feels about it-- aside from the obvious distaste. When it was necessary for him to perform an assassination he preferred using quick, direct methods.]

Yet it's fine for you to make these decisions about the lives of others?

... I should like company, if you feel like keeping it?

[she tries not to put so much hope on it, she knows people don't just come at her beck and call any more.]

It's common... From what I understand of your world, you live a quiet, subtle existence in your goings, however violent they may be. [She understands it, even if she hates it. She wonders if he can understand at all.] It goes further then just dying in mine, you see? Because I am not of common blood, I am a daughter of Kings, great lions of men, and so am a lion myself, thus the death cannot be quiet, not if my enemy wishes to be great. I must be stripped, first of my title, then my life... and then, when my head is stuck on a pike and displayed on the bridge for children to stare at, will they have taken my honour, and the honour of my family. But I accept that too, if that is my fate.

[She opened her mouth to snap at him the usual reply, that she was ordained by God. But somehow, she didn't think he'd find that an answer.] ... I am what I am, because someone must be. I asked the same thing of myself, but if I do not, if I let my country become weak and taken? What sort of Queen would I be? But at least I can do so with some humility. I try to show mercy where I can, and only kill if I must, and only after I am attacked first. [She had standards unlike... There was a cruel tilt to her lips then.] And believe me, that is more then many do, even in my own family.

[ Shisui hadn't seen the message, having only just got back from Konoha a while ago. His eye has been looked into both by Itachi and by Yukio, and instead of wearing a bandage around it, he has it closed. Shisui has no idea that Elizabeth is in the church at all, and had only ventured out because he had been bored, and was looking for some place quiet to think.

But upon entering, he hears the distinct sound of sobbing echoing throughout the empty church, and his brows knit in a frown. It doesn't take long for him to recognize who it is, for who could mistake that elaborate dress?

Pushing his own personal concerns away, he pads over to the altar, doing his best to not startle her as he approaches from behind, then quietly takes his place beside her on the floor, sitting down cross-legged, about a distance of three feet between them.

He says nothing, but only observes her from where he is sat, as quiet as ever, letting her cry over whatever it is that bothered her.

...Eventually, he looks up at the altar and at the paintings over it, faded and peeling, crumbling in places. There are people sat around a large table, dining. Not just any people, he guesses, noticing the remnants of a halo behind one person, who is obviously supposed to be the center of focus. The man's face is half peeled away, yet there is a faint smile, though the eyes stare off into the distance, as if they carry a secret.

What is the significance? he wonders silently. What is the significance of a bunch of people sat around a dinner table? Oh, perhaps they are saints. But--

Shisui's eyebrows dip in a slight frown as he looks to Elizabeth once more, only to look back up at the men painted above the altar, accusing.

Why don't you look at her?

...Couldn't they see she was hurting? ]

[Misery she found, compounded itself in silence, and when the only thing she could hear was her own crying, it seemed too loud to hear anything else, certainly not him. But then misery also loved company.

It's only after she's exhausted, that it sort of dies itself, sobs just become little hitches of breath, and she wasn't one to wallow, because if she started down that path, she'd never stop. Best to let this be done as quickly as possible, like poison from a wound. Only this one would fester no doubt for awhile, like any deep fear did. Trying to hide it though, she pulled out her handkercheif, that she had embroidered with that swan, and pressed it to her eyes, drying them.

Except apparently, she wasn't alone as she would of thought when she looked up again. She doesn't startle though, barely even blinks at him when she sees him. Normally she'd be overjoyed, fuss over him like she had before. Right now, she couldn't manage a smile. For one so usually animate, she's dulled.

Just one slow breath in, before dropped her eyes down and away.] I had no thought you would come to this place, my lord Shisui. Shouldn't you be resting for your eye?

[Because she had seen, and she'd been horrified, but there were others to take care of him, he had his family after all. She had nothing, and the bitterness made her swallow down.]

[ By the time she addressed him, Shisui had taken to a meditative posture, trying to contemplate his own actions. The sobbing had died down, he noticed. Yet though the building seemed quieter, the silence itself hung heavy around them.

There was nothing liberating about it; there was no peace of mind.

When he spoke, he did not look up from his position. ]

I had meant to visit this place when I was here last.

[ And only now does he look up-- though not at her, but at the dilapidated mural above the altar. He disregards any comment about his eye, because at the moment, all that is trivial. ]

Were you looking for answers?

Edited 2012-06-27 15:36 (UTC)

[There was no peace of mind to be had, she knew that, she'd done this enough to know that all the way down to her bones, where the cold wind from the east. Too many uncertainties, and the loss of control almost made her shake. Or had already, she couldn't tell what was making her hands tremble.]

No, no answers. I just wanted something familiar, I've nothing of home, no family, nor friends, I just... [She looked up at the painting, at Christ smiling benevolently, and she tried to draw strength from it. He knew of his death after all, to die one far more painful then hers at that. Out of habit, she raised a hand and crossed herself, then touched her finger tips her lips.]

Do you not long for the same, sometimes? Somewhere safe?

[ Shisui glanced at her then. He wondered in silence if lack of familiarity was what made her tremble so. It didn't add up, of course, and he couldn't help but stare at her hands, and then in what she proceeded to do, curiously watching as she made the sign of the cross over her chest.

The question makes him look away, though, and he stares at his hands instead; those hands that had severed the lives of many in order to protect those he loved. Was that in any way fair? ]

I do... [ If it was sanctuary, then it had been something he had longed for for years, all his life, though unfortunately would never live to see it. ]

Does this place remind you of home? Is that why... [ He pauses, not sure if she minded him asking.

Shisui knew that girls cried and let their emotions show a little more freely than men, but never did he put it down to just a 'female attribute'. He hated seeing people cry, and wished he could fix them all. He was not allowed to show emotion, but Shisui was no stranger to it. And, for whatever reason she had been shedding those tears, Shisui knew that it wasn't just something to do with 'being a woman'. There was no excuse to ignore it. ]

Edited 2012-06-27 17:16 (UTC)

Take comfort in it now, then face everything as a challenge when you return.

I have time and I don't mind it. [ Lenalee is, though, willing to drop things in order to help, if she can. ] Where is your room?

[Aww, Raven recognizes the compliment--but she is more concerned for Elizabeth.]

From the history I learned, you do not fail them. You succeed quite well, such that last I had heard in the version of England from my world, there was an Elizabeth the 2nd reigning well on the throne, and this is about 4 centuries at least past your own.

[Hopefully that'll give her enough to have comfort, without need of knowing more. Because knowing something horrible is going to happen, and you can't do anything to change it?---it's the most horrid burden in the world, and one Raven knows well.]

More...privately Elizabeth--I can sympathize in a way I'd rather not detail, what it is like--having the foreknowledge of something terrible that one can not prevent. I am glad that you do not have that.

I guess I have little other choice but then to do that.

[Elizabeth nodded, showing she hear at the least, but the relief of hearing that makes her press her face into her hands again, and draw ragged breaths, just letting it in sink in.]

Then take the only hope offered -- you can never know what might happen until it happens. [it's just a mumble from behind her hands, because it was the only thing she really had.]

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[Video] VI [Failed!Lock to Cross & Lavi]

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